Da Rules...

We're sure (because we're arrogant) that a lot of people are going to say "What a great idea !". We're confident that people will say "I'd love to come" but then we're positive that people are going to say "Well, how does it work ?" So, for the avoidance of doubt, here is how we are going to run our film club.

1. There is no charge. We are inviting you to join us for a social gathering. We might give you the opportunity to help with refreshments from time to time, but as this is not a big production (I mean, I made the screen out of four bits of molding trim and an old bedsheet) we do not expect contributions. Most importantly, if there is no charge then you can't complain and ask for your money back.
2. As I said, No complaining.
3. This is a film club, not a houseparty. Whilst we will allow you to use the bathrooms, we do not expect bored kids to take refuge in the basement with the Xbox 360, so if you bring your kids, set the right expectation with them.
4. Bring your own chairs, blankets, coolers, picnic tables, whatever you need to feel comfortable. Lord knows our yard is big enough to accommodate. We'll probably have the grill on if you want to bring marshmallows.
5. Please, please tell us in advance if you are coming, but don't worry if you're not. We want to know how many to expect, so we can set the screen up accordingly, since we hope club membership will be quite high...
6. All films start at 8.30pm. We have tested our facilities, and this is the earliest we can start to get a decent picture, whilst still ending at a reasonable hour. Time (and movies) wait for no man.
7. Don't bother parking on ourdrive. Park on Darrow and come through the fence. Just follow the sound of movie soundtracks and look for the big white screen.
8. We will be having (at least for the first season) alternating family movies and adult movies. Please check both the rating and the duration beforehand. A movie which runs 150 minutes will not finish before 11pm.

We hope you don't think we're being officious. We believe that things go more smoothly when people know what to expect, and this might turn into the kind of military-type operation with little margin for error !